Caneman & Erin Mills
Daria and Jane are (C) 2004
Viacom International and MTV Networks
Continued from the end of “Herd About Ms.Li”
Daria had spent the better part of that day laying in her hospital bed,
feeling generally sorry for herself, as well as just a tinge of
homesickness. Her parents had reacted as expected, panic bordering on
psychosis, especially since neither could leave their jobs and attend
to her. Fortunately, the doctor had reassured them she wasn’t on her
deathbed, and that the stress of them coming might actually prove worse.
I could just kiss that man, she thought, settling back against her
pillow as a fresh wave of nausea washed over her. If I didn’t think I
was about to barf, that is. I could just as easily be doing this in my
dorm room, where all my books and computer are. That was her last
thought for awhile, as the medications kicked in and she slipped away
into a dreamless sleep.
The next morning, she was awakened by a familiar voice. “Tsk, tsk, tsk.
Well, at least this time you aren’t lobster-colored, like last time,”
Jane’s voice spoke to her. Opening her eyes wide, she did a double-take
at her friend standing over her.
“What the? Jane! How the hell did you get here? And why in God’s name
are you dressed like that? Oh, wait…Okay, I’m just having another one
of those hallucinations again. I’d better get me a nurse…” she mumbled,
reaching for the call-button.
Jane smiled and pulled it out of her friend’s reach. “Uh-uh. That’s the
last thing we need in here right now. No, amiga, you’re not
hallucinating, it’s me in the flesh, and as for the uniform, well…let’s
just say hospital policy forbids anyone other than family members to
visit you right now, and I had to indulge in some creative response to
Jane was attired in a correct, classical nurses’ uniform, right down to
the funny hat, sensible shoes, and stethoscope, holding a chart quite
professionally. “I took shameless advantage of my mom’s credit card and
frequent flyer miles to hop the red-eye up here after we talked last
night. The uniform was a simple matter of going down the street to the
store, and voila! Nurse Jane, at your service. Now, let’s just check
your vitals just in case a real nurse stumbles in here, okay?” she
Daria’s wrist and pressing a finger to her vein.
“Bravo. Or rather, brava, as O’Neill would say. I hate to say it, but
you look and act more like a real nurse than the actual article here.
Is criminal impersonation another one of your hobbies you never told me
about?” Daria commented, as her friend entered the information onto the
chart before reaching over to an electronic thermometer attached to the
“Among others. Open wide, and keep this under your tongue while I
explain. You see, in addition to Wind’s inability to maintain a
relationship longer than two weeks, he’s also a practicing
hypochondriac, and over the years, I was forced into playing nurse for
most of his ‘ailments’. I’ve picked up quite a few tips and tricks from
his frequent hospital visits, as well, so playing the role isn’t too
hard by now. Hmmm, still a little elevated, I see. Let’s do a quick BP
on you and we can chat for a bit before I have to split.” Jane added,
wrapping the cuff around Daria’s bare arm.
“Handy. I don’t suppose you have a plan if a doctor sees you and wants
some help, do you?” she asked, feeling the device tighten around her
arm. “I’m pretty sure this is a crime here, unlike Lawndale.”
“Pish! I’ve already irrigated a wound, drawn three tubes of blood, and
changed two dressings. These clowns are so used to seeing ‘floaters’
from other units here they don’t care who it is, as long as they don’t
have to do it. Had breakfast yet?” she asked, writing down the last of
the data the device recorded.
“What if there’s a real emergency? Or, they grab you for an operation
or something? Maybe you should lose those clothes, Jane, before you get
in trouble or something.” Daria replied, nervously.
Jane chuckled as she shook her head. “And walk around in my underwear?
They’d put me on the Psych Ward for sure, then. Besides, I have to
return these later today so my mom doesn’t totally flake when she see
these charges on her card. The airfare she won’t notice, but this will
catch her eye. As for operations, if I were in scrubs, maybe, and
emergencies on this floor are few and far between. It’s not like you’re
in an ICU or anything.”
“Hey, you’re the one who’ll need to answer. Whatever. It’s great to see you again, Jane. I was sorta…” Daria looked away.
“Lonely? I figured. When you told me your folks couldn’t come up to see
you, I figured you might need some cheering up. Okay, now tell me how
all this started…” she said, pulling up a chair and sitting down. Daria
smirked and looked away as she began to relate the tale again.
“…and then I came to in the dorm room, with my weird-ass roommate and
the RA standing over me freaking out. I swear, I’ll never set foot in
that place again! It was bad enough I let them talk me into going to a
bar in the first place, let alone a bar like that. I guess the
combination of a couple drinks, the pain pills and the sight of a room
full of leather geeks pushed me over the edge. As for that dream, I’m
sorry I told it to you, but there it is. If it’s anything, I’m not…that
way…okay?” Daria ended, blushing mightily.
“Never thought it for a second, especially after you snagged Tom out
from under me, but that’s old news. I’d say you were just acting out
some of those weird sex dreams you refuse to tell me about and one got
the better of you,” Jane replied, with a grin. “DO you wanna hear one
of mine?” she teased, with a twinkle in her eye.
“Good Lord, no! I swear, as soon as I can get out of here and into a
real shower, I’m going to stay under it until my skin peels off. By the
way, does that thing say when I’ll be able to blow this asylum?” she
asked. Jane looked at the file again, shaking her head.
“Hmmm, says here, the doc wants to keep you here until your white count
is normal, just in case the infection from your tooth decides to bite
back. Seems you and antibiotics don’t get along too well, which is why
you’re so nauseous right now, hmmm? I’ll see if I can’t get you
something to make that go away…” she said, scribbling something on the
“Hey! You can’t just write an order for drugs! You’re not even a real
nurse, dammit! What did you write, by the way?” Daria hissed, looking
towards the door. Jane laughed softly.
“Nothing bad, don’t worry. All the crap they’re pumping you full of
isn’t all that exotic, and I’m pretty sure you won’t have a reaction.
Hey, I didn’t kill Wind when I did that when he was in the hospital,
and I like you.” Before she could protest further, a weak voice called
out from the other side of the room, where a curtain was drawn between
the two beds in the room.
“Nurse? Nurse? I need to go, please! Help me!” and old woman called
out. Jane rolled her eyes and got up. “The only bad part about this
get-up is you have to play the game. I’ll be back in a second, amiga!”
Amazed, Daria watched and listened as Jane went to the old woman and
talked to her like she’d been a nurse all her life, and she could hear
(the curtain being drawn) the sounds of bedclothes rustling and a few
grunts as she assisted the other patient onto a bedpan. A few minutes
later, after flushing the contents down the toilet, she returned,
pulling off a pair of latex gloves.
“That should keep her quiet for awhile. Look, Daria, I better go before
your real nurse comes back, okay? And since it seems to bother you
seeing me dressed like this, I’ll come back pretending to be Quinn
tomorrow. I saw a place that sells wigs and stuff, and with a little
creativity, I’m sure I can pull off the vacant, self-absorbed act,” she
said, rising to go.
“Oh sure, really give me nightmares, why don’t you?” Daria sighed. “I
can always ask if they’ll bend the rules and let you visit me instead.”
“Naw, I’m having too much fun doing it this way. I’d better get out of
here before someone sees me and makes me help pass out breakfast trays
or something. Get some sleep, and I’ll see you tomorrow!” Jane smirked,
replacing Daria’s file at the end of the bed.
“Looking forward to it, except for the Quinn part. Jane? Thanks for
coming…” she said, sleepily. Jane patted her on the head, and gave her
a little hug, brushing her cheek with the faintest of kisses.
“No more nightmares! Consider it doctor’s orders, or, nurses orders to
be more precise!” Jane chuckled softly, as she watched her friends eyes
flutter and close.
“You got it…snzzzzzzzzz…..” came the feeble reply.
Jane stepped out into the hall, thinking, I sure hope so, amiga, I sure hope so….
Daria opened her eyes again, and everything seemed…off. Hmmm, why is it
so quiet? she thought, looking around her room. Her roommate seemed to
be gone. Probably some more tests for the old biddy, she mused, trying
to turn on the TV.
“Oh great, the one time I can actually sit and watch without having her
bitch all the time,” she muttered. “Hello? Hello? Now where the hell IS
Instead of the usual buzz that seemed to permeate the ward, there was a
dead silence all around her, and it seemed uncomfortably warm. She
pressed the call button experimentally, and waited. “Great. All of them
are on break. Well, that means I can get out of bed and go to the can
without being scolded,” she said to herself, throwing back the covers
and dangling her bare feet over the edge. I wonder if this is such a
good idea, she mused, remembering how she’d felt just a day or two
before. Slipping from her bed, she clutched the open back of her flimsy
gown as she padded to the door.
Where is everyone? This place is deserted. Oh well, I suppose they must
have one hell of a strong union…she mused, creeping to the nurses
station. Something’s wrong here…
“And just why are you out of your bed, hmmm?” Jane’s voice rang out in
the eerie silence. “Or do you want to have a relapse?” Daria whirled
“Jane! Jesus, you scared the shit out of me! What the hell’s going on
around here? Where is everyone?” she exclaimed in relief. The she saw
her friend and took a step backward. “Jane?”
Standing before her, Jane Lane was attired again in a nurse’s uniform,
but just barely. Pristine white runner shone with an oily gleam from
her hat to the extremely short dress, as well as thigh-high lace up
boots with brutally high heels, white as the rest of her attire. To
either side of her stood a thick-necked orderly, each the size of an
NFL linebacker. Jane snapped her fingers, and the two goons sprang
forward and seized Daria by the arms.
“You understand this is for you own good, amiga…” Jane said in passing, as the orderlies dragged the struggling girl away.
“Dammit, let me go! Jane, what the hell is going on? Okay, it’s a damn
good joke, but it’s over now! Jane! Jaaaaaaaannnnne!” she screamed, as
they pulled her into a room and wrestled her onto a bed. She bucked and
writhed as they strapped her hands and feet into thick leather
restraints before one wrenched her jaw open while the other jammed a
metal instrument into her mouth.
“Haaaaaeeeeeeehhhh! Huuuuhhhhh!” she hollered uselessly as the two huge
men departed silently. Jane appeared in the doorway, with a decadent
smirk on her face.
“I am SO sorry it has to be this way, Daria, but sometimes your
stubbornness gets in the way of your common sense,” she said in a
condescending tone as she approached the bed. “If I let you run around
willy-nilly while you’re supposed to be getting better, I wouldn’t be a
very good nurse, now would I?”
But you’re not a real nurse, dammit! Daria thought furiously,
abandoning any further attempts at verbalizing her displeasure. You’ve
gone insane…Her eyes widened as Jane opened cabinet drawer and withdrew
a hypodermic needle.
“Now, Nurse Janey gonna make you feel all better…” she sneered, as she
drove the needle home in arm as Daria screamed again. Her vision
blurred, and darkness swept over her.
When she awoke, she became acutely aware that she was completely naked, and Jane stood over her with a strange look on her face.
“How are you feeling now, amiga? Better, I hope,” she said huskily,
pulling on a surgical glove. “I’m afraid that your condition is more
serious than we had thought, and we have to take drastic measures. I’d
say open up and say ahhh, but that’s already been taken care of,” she
smirked, running a gloved finger around Daria’s open and trembling
"Hmmm..." Jane hmmm'ed. "Nothing wrong with your teeth. Very flexible
tongue...may have to do more tests with that later." She grinned that
evil toothy grin again, and Daria trembled.
Jane shucked off the glove and pulled another one on. "Well, since you
absolutely insisted on climbing out of bed, now I have to do a thorough
exam to make sure you didn't do any damage to yourself." She stepped
out of Daria's field of vision. Daria hear her rummaging through some
drawers then heard the sound of a jar being opened. Jane reappeared,
holding a blue jar in one hand and what looked like a minature remote
control in the other.
"Jnnnnn!" Daria tried to speak, but the jaw spreader in her mouth
prevented it from being intelligible. Jane grinned down at her again.
"First off, I think we need to take a temperature, but since that clamp
is holding your mouth open, we'll just have to do it the old fashioned
way." With that Jane clicked a button on the remote, and Daria suddenly
felt the bed underneath her rear begin to divide. Both ends of the bed
elevated and her legs began to spread. Daria's eyes widened and she
tried to protest, her dry throat forcing air out in pitiful squeaks.
Soon, she found herself with her legs spread and elevated, and her rear
end exposed completely to Jane, who had put down the remote and was now
holding the jar and wheeling over a small metal tray with a very large
glass thermometer on a towel. Jane whistled absently as she dipped the
fingers of her gloved free hand into the jar.
"Need to lube you up a little before I put the thermometer in. I hope
you aren't going to give me any trouble, amiga. Then I'll have to
discipline you. Hmmm...on second thought, maybe a little resistance
wouldn't be so bad..."
Jane put the jar down, then stepped between Daria's legs. She placed
the unlubed hand on Daria's stomach, and slid the lubed fingers of her
other hand slowly down the cleft of Daria's buttocks. She looked into
Daria's frightened eyes.
"Just relax, Daria," she murmured huskily, "Remember, I'm only thinking
of your health." With that, Daria felt the slightly sickening sensation
of Jane's fingers sliding deep into her rectum. What she didn't expect
was the sudden jolt of sensation it sent to her breasts and vagina.
Jane slowly pushed and pulled her fingers, twisting them around. Daria
felt the slimy coldness of the lubricant warm as Jane manipulated her
anus. Daria moaned softly and Jane's smile turned softer.
"Just relax," she said soothingly, "I'm taking my fingers out now." She
slowly withdrew her fingers, then shucked off the glove and picked p
the thermometer, dipping the tip in the jar of lube. "Okay, deep breath
and relax as much as you can."
Before Daria had a chance to inhale, Jane slid the long thermometer
into her rear. Daria's eyes widened and she yelped incoherently as the
glass cylinder penetrated her most private nook. Jane twiddled
the thrmometer a bit, causing additional squeals to eminate from Daria.
The evil smirk returned to Jane's face. "Okay, while that does it's
thing, I'm gonna get one or two other preliminaries out of the way."
Daria struggled against her bonds as Jane turned away from her again,
fiddling with something in one of the nearby cupboards. As she did so,
she let out a dry gasp. Her throat and mouth were drying out. Jane
"I hope that thermometer is still where I left it." she said without
turning her back "You don't want me to have to get...nasty, now do you?"
Daria froze, not liking the sinister tone in Jane's voice. She forced
herself to stop struggling...and reluctantly tightened her sphincter to
keep a grip on the thermometer.
Jane turned back, now wearing a stethoscope around her neck. She smiled again.
"Good girl. Now, I'm going to take a listen to you, and when I'm done I'll take the thermometer out."
Daria tried to swallow as best she could, forcing air through her
nostrils, trying to remain calm. Jane placed the stethoscope
earpieces in her ears and pressed the bell onto Daria's sternum.
"Unnngh!" Daria yelped. Jane quirked an eyebrow, then smiled again.
"Ooops, forgot. These things seem to always be cold, don't they? Don't
worry. I'll take care of that.” Jane picked up the bell, and breathed
slowly on it, keeping her eyes on Daria as she did so. Daria watched
transfixed. It was a simple enough action, but Jane was dragging it out
to the point that it was somehow extraordinarily...dirty.
Of course, her transfixtion turned to yet another shock when Jane
leaned over her and repeated the process on her bare skin. Daria let
out a little squeak as Jane’s warm breath coursed over her chest. It
was warm and a little wet.
Oh wow... Daria thought, That’s just...NO! What the hell are you
thinking?! Forget about this. Find a way off this damn table, you idiot!
And of course, it was at this point that Jane put the stethoscope back
on Daria’s chest and began moving over underneath her left breast.
Daria froze as the tube leading from the bell to the earpieces brushed
against her rigid nipple, sending a breif jolt of pleasure through her
“unnggghhh...” she uttered. Jane looked down at her.
“Oh you like that, huh? Much better now that it isn’t so cold?
Hmmm...let’s try the other side now.” Jane slid the bell over Daria’s
ribs to below her right breast, listened, then nodded.
“Heart rate’s a little elevated, but nothing unusual. Now, let’s do a
couple more checks.” Jane slid the stethoscope up, over the curve of
Daria’s tit, bringing the bell to rest against her nipple. Daria
inhaled sharply as Jane began to move the bell around her areola, the
edge of the bell making little circles around the pert bud of her
“AHHHHHHGNN!” Daria cried, jaw hurting like mad. Jane giggled.
“Ohhh, she likes it. Well then...” Jane moved the bell again and gave
Daria’s left nipple the same treatment, moving the bell around and
around her friend’s nipple and back again, until both were flushed and
looked ridgid enough to cut glass.
“OH GAHHHHHHHH” Daria’s incoherent cries increased as her nipples
stiffened to the point of pain. Her breasts were sending little shocks
of feeling to her whole body. SHe was so preoccupied with the
sensations, that she hardly noticed Jane putting the stehoscope down.
At least, until Jane yanked the thermometer out of her ass with no
warning whatsoever. Daria yelped again and looked at her bogus nurse
captor, who was holding the thermometer up to the light.
“Hmm...99.3.” she pronounced, “A little high, but also nothing to get too excited about.”
Daria blinked as she noticed Jane was now holding a clipboard that she
was sure hadn’t been there previously. Jane scribbled a note on the
clipboard then turned back to Daria. “Almost done.
Got to do a couple of manual exams just to check you over, then I’ll
let you go back to bed.”
Daria frowned. Manual exams? That better not mean--
Her thoughts were interrupted as Jane pulled on a fresh pair of exam
gloves. The latex echoed through the room with a loud snap. Jane leered
at her helpless paitent as she wheeled the tray with the lubricant on
it back over. “Three exams, amiga. I’m going to do the breast exam
first. Just relax and flow with it. Most people like it...I know I do.”
With that Jane reached out and placed her hands firmly on Daria's
breasts. Daria gasped as Jane's latex clad plams brushed against her
stiff nipples. The gasps turned to moans as Jane began to rub and
massage her chest, squeezing gently here, pinching lightly there. Jane
grinned and suddenly gave both of Daria's nipples a qick pinch.
"AAAIIIGGHHNNN!" Daria yelped, her back arching at the jolt of pleasure
that flowed through her. Jane laughed and lowered her head, clamping
her lips around Daria's left nipple and sucking gently. The response
was instant, Daria began arching her back, driving her breast against
Jane's lips. Jane held the nipple between her teeth and begins flicking
it with the tip of her tongue. Daria screamed in delight as the
sensations overwhelmed her brain. Jane leand back up, grinned, then
proceeded to give Daria's right breast the same treatment.
After what seemed like an eternity, Jane stood back up, and Daria
collapsed on the exam table, breathing loudly through her still pried
open mouth, eyes rolled back in her head.
"VERY good reactions...and no lumps either." Jane said, shucking off
the gloves. SHe reached behind her and snapped on a new pair. "Next
up...the vaginal exam."
Daria's eyes snapped forward, and her eyebrows shot up in disbelief.
Jane grinned her evil toothy grin again and rested her index finger
between Daria's breasts. Daria began struggling
against her bonds again, but Jane forced and held her down with her
“Ngahhhhh…” Daria half sobbed, as her friend traced her finger down her
body, brushing her strangely erect nipples and down her belly towards…
“Uhhhhh-uhhhhh! Jnnnnn! Ngggggghhhhh!” she gasped, as Jane’s finger
began to tease the sensitive flesh of her vagina, flicking back and
forth as they explored her tiny orifice. The knuckles of Jane's other
fingers idly brushed up against Daria's clit causing her hips to buck
involuntarily once or twice.
“I see you’re still in as-issued condition, amiga. A minor
inconvenience to be sure, but I know just what to do,” Jane giggled,
reluctantly pulling her finger away. "But before I deal with that, I
think it's time to do a quick rectal."
"Rectal?!" Daria yelped, but because of the clamp it came out more like
"Yecktalgh?!" Jane dipped two fingers into the jar of lubricant. "Now,
Daria, just relax and don't fight me. Remember, this is for your own
With that, Jane once again plunged her fingers deep into Daria's ass.
This time, however, they went deeper. Daria could feel Jane pushing,
probling, feeling around the walls of her cavity. The feeling was
unpleasant, but still, little twinges flowed to her pussy, adding to
the wetness that had already formed. Daria moaned and writhed on the
table, unconsciously raising her hips so Jane could have better access.
After a few more probes, Jane withdrew her fingers and shucked off the
glove, replacing it again with a new one. She frowned down at
Daria. "Well, I've done the exam, and it looks like we can forego
the enema, unfortunately. However, frankly, Daria, you do have a
Daria looked up fearfully, wondering what further indignities her
deranged friend was going to put her through. Jane looked at her with a
"I'm afraid you suffer from rampant virginity. Normally, this problem
takes care of itself, but I really don't think you should go any
further in your college career without taking care of it. It can cause
all sorts of stress in your life. So, as your devoted friend and
nursing professional, I'm going to remove it for you."
In horror, Daria watched as she stood up straight and began to open her
blouse, letting it fall to the floor. Her boots chuffed and squeaked as
she wiggled out of her outfit, to reveal her matching rubber lingerie.
“Do you like what you see? Good, because it’s all part of the cure, my
dear,” she said in a hushed tone, as her fingers slid down her stomach,
into her white rubber panties and found her own vagina.
Not only has she gone mad, but now she’s gonna diddle herself in front
of me? Why am I feeling so turned on? The needle, it has to be what she
injected me, Daria thought, as she felt her body ache for Jane’s touch
again. “Ngggghhhhh! Aggghhhhhh!” she gasped, her mouth open and aching
from the jaw-spreader. As if on cue, Jane mounted the bed and knelt
“Yes, this condition calls for rather extreme measures,” she said
again, removing the device and kissing her deeply. At first, Daria
recoiled as Jane’s lips met hers, and her tongue darted in, but she
surrendered to the invasion, and her tongue ventured carefully back.
Jane pulled back with a smile. “I bet you’ve been waiting for that for
a loooong time now, haven’t you? You want this, don’t you? You need
“Yesssss, yes I do,” Daria gasped, her head swimming and her body a
live wire of sensation as her friend lay atop her, her hands framing
her face. “Don’t stop, please, don’t stop…” she heard herself saying,
even as a tiny voice screamed, What’s wrong with you? She’s your best
friend, and look at what she’s doing to you! Heedless, she let Jane
kiss her deeply again, feeling her gloved hands sliding down her nude
body, and she closed her eyes and arched her back as they found her
vagina again. “What are you going to do to me now?” she asked,
breathlessly, as Jane slid down to her crotch. “Jane! No!
EeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyeeeeeSSSSSSS!!!!” she screamed, as she felt her tongue
dart into her tiny hole, still unsullied by a male member, swollen and
wanting. Jane’s tongue traced the opening, and little by little, forced
its way deeper in that anything had ever been before.
"OOOHH SHIIIIIIIIT!" Daria cried as Jane's tongue snaked it's way
through her folds, before sliding back out, circling her clit and back
in again. Daria soon found her hips thrusting violently up towards
Jane's face. She moaned loudly, overwhelmed by the sensations. She felt
a pressure building, rising, searching for release...
And then Jane pulled her tongue out of her friend's lovehole.
Daria tilted her head. "You stopped...you didn't..no..."
Jane laughed and kissed her again, Daria's own fluids still on her
lips. "Relax, amiga, I wouldn't leave you in such a state. But I wanted
to give you something really special."
Jane stepped out of Daria's view for a few moments, leaving her to
struggle against the bods that prevented her hands form reaching down
and finding some release. After what seemed like an eternity, Jane
reappeared, the remote for the exam table in her hand. SHe clicked a
button and Daria found her self being elevate into a reclined sitting
She also found, with wide eyed shock, that Jane was now wearing a
clinically white strap-on dildo. Jane took her finger off the remote,
tossed it aside and stepped between Daria's legs again.
"Time for your operation, Daria, dear..."
And with that, she thrust the strap-on deep into her helpless friend's
eager pussy. Daria cried out incoherently, as Jane thrust deep
into her. Daria's face was screwed up in a mix of pain and pleasure.
Jane leaned forward and kissed her again.
"Shhh..it's like that to start, but just relax, Nurse Janey'll make you feel much better."
Jane began to move her hips, slowly at first, but with increasing speed
and rythmn. Daria moaned loudly each time Jane thrust into her. Over
and over again. The pressure returned and built to twice what it was.
Jane wa smoaning right along with her.
"Yes! Yes, Jane! Cure me! Cure me!" In the back of her mind Daria thought Did I really just beg for her to cure me?
But any embarassment was soon overwhelemed as she felt something shift
inside her and she began screaming at the top of her lungs as her brain
short circuted and an explosion went off in her groin, searing through
her nerve endings. Jane soon followed suit, but didn't stop pounding
away at Daria. She leaned forward and resumed nursing on Daria's
breasts, which redoubled Daria's own feelings and caused another orgasm
to course through her.
She opened her eyes wide, and an odd thought occurred to her just then.
Where are my glasses? I can’t see without my glasses, yet I can see
everything as clear as ever…
“Jane! Stop! Something’s not right!” she gasped, and out of the corner
of her eye she saw the curtains move as if someone had walked past. In
horror, she saw an old woman’s form appear diaphanous before the two
young women coupling on the table. “Jane!” she hissed. “We’re not
alone!” but her friend seemed not to hear as the phantasm approached,
and she heard a thin, dry voice speaking out.
“Daaaaaaaarrrrriiiiiaaaaa, waaakkkke upppppppp…” over and over, and in
a flash, she remembered where she’d seen that face before as the
ghostly form drew nearer.
“Mrs. Sullivan? Eleanor Sullivan? What are you doing here?” she gasped,
trying to alert Jane, who seemed oblivious as she ground the artificial
phallus ever deeper into her genitals as the ghostly voice kept
repeating over and over,
“Waaaaaakkkkkkeeee upppp, waaaaaakkkke uppppp, waaaaaakkkkkee upppppp…”
as her vision dimmed and everything went black and cold to her once
“…Wake up! Miss Morgendorffer, please! Wake up!” an insistent voice
said again as she opened her eyes. Like a bolt, the sounds of a busy
hospital ward assaulted her ears, and the light was different again.
The face above hers wasn’t Jane’s, but that of her regular nurse,
creased with concern. “Miss Morgendorffer! Daria! You were screaming
and upsetting your roommate! Wake up!” the middle-aged woman said
insistently. Daria blinked several times, and noticed her vision was
its normal blurriness.
“A dream. It was all a dream,” she croaked, as the nurse’s hand went to her forehead. “Jane….”
“Oh my goodness, you’re still burning up! Miss Morgendorffer, I’m
afraid you’ll have to step outside for a few moments,” she said over
her shoulder. Daria’s face wrinkled in confusion.
“Step outside? But you just said I’m burning up? I don’t understand…”
she asked, in a small voice and the nurse smiled and patted her on the
“Oh! I’m sorry! I was speaking to your sister. She came all the way up
from Lawndale to see you. But I think the doctor needs to see you first
before she can,” the woman said. Daria rose up from her pillow and
seized her by the blouse.
“No! I-I want to talk to her! I need to talk to her! Please!” she
begged, as the nurse took her hand. “I feel okay enough. It’s
“Okay! Just let go of me, and I’ll let you speak for a few minutes, but
the doctor must know what’s going on with you,” she replied firmly.
“Miss Morgendorffer, Quinn, you can come in now, but you’ll have to
leave when the doctor arrives,” she spoke to someone outside the room.
Daria saw a blurry, red-haired figure enter and stand beside the bed.
“Oh my gawd! Daria! You look so, like, ill or something?” Jane’s voice
mimicked Quinn’s inane prattle. “Is she like, gonna yack or something?
Cause I don’t wanna get, you know, that all over my new shoes!”
“No, no, she’ll be fine! But if she does get a little…queasy, there’s a
basin in here,” the nurse replied, pointing to the nightstand.
“Thanks!” Jane bubbled, and turned to face Daria. “Hi sis! I told you
I’d visit,” she winked. Giving the nurse a look that meant it was time
to depart, she waited until they were alone.
“Jane! You don’t know how glad I am to see you!” Daria almost sobbed, as Jane sat down.
“Jeez! I didn’t know this was that tough a hospital! Wow! You are
burning up! Do you need some water, amiga?” she replied, concern in her
voice as she felt Daria’s brow.
“It’s not that, it’s just…wow, you DO look like Quinn. Either that, or I am having another one of my hallucinations again.
Either way, I’m glad you didn’t show up in your nurse costume again…”
“Hey! Shush about that! I’m your dizzy-ass sister Quinn now, remember?”
she whispered fiercely. “You’re still not supposed to have any visitors
outside of your immediate family yet! And if they find out about the
mysterious nurse yesterday, they might not even let them in, so watch
it! By the way, nice to see you again too, ‘sis’, now how about some
water before you die in front of me?” Jane asked, pouring her a cup
Taking the small plastic vessel, she drained it in one gulp and held it
out for more. “What happened last night? I mean, you and those two big
guys, and the bed with the straps and that outfit you were wearing…”
she trailed off, as she realized what had happened.
“You had another one of those dreams again, didn’t you? And here I
thought your one with E.T. were weird. I don’t suppose you’re going to
tell me, are you?” Jane asked, as she watched Daria flush crimson and
“Oh gawd…I’m sorry, Jane, it was just so real…I mean, ‘Quinn’…I don’t
know anymore,” she half sobbed, her empty cup falling from her fingers.
Jane took it up and refilled it, seeing that Daria’s gown was soaked
with sweat, and she looked concerned.
“Damn, whatever happened to you isn’t playing fair is it? I can see
that big brain of yours doesn’t do so well when you’re sick, does it?”
she asked, setting the cup down again. “Maybe I should leave for now
until after the doc see ya, huh?”
“No, Jane, errr, Quinn. I’m feeling okay now. It’s just that the dream
was…Oh damn, I can’t tell you right now,” she said quietly, looking
away. Jane rolled her eyes.
“This wouldn’t be like that last one, was it? Oh boy…Look, don’t
over-analyze it, okay? When people are sick, their heads come up with
some weird things, and if I just happened to be in them, it doesn’t
mean anything in the real world, right? It was just a dream, Daria.
Remember that, just a dream. I don’t suppose you feel up to giving me
the details of this one, do you?”
Shaking her head, Daria continued to look away. “No. Not yet, and maybe
never. I don’t know…” Looking back, she squinted at her friend. “By the
way, not a bad job of impersonating my sister. Right down to the
annoying tone she has. Ever consider making it a career?” she quipped,
settling back against her pillow.
“You really think so?” Jane squeaked, bouncing her red wig about.
“Like, it was soooo hard to find just the right outfit on such short
notice! I mean, do you know how many places I had to go to find these
jeans? And these damn shoes, too?” she replied, in a frighteningly
close approximation of her voice.
Daria laughed weakly. “Yep, that’s her all right. Look, I’ll tell you
about the dream later, okay? I’m not ready to describe it in any detail
“I can imagine. I was hearing the tail end of it right outside the
door. I know I hear you telling me to stop. What exactly was it you
wanted me to stop, hmmm?” Jane smirked, tossing her false locks
“Like I said, I’ll tell you when I’m feeling better. Let’s just say I’m
really glad you didn’t show up in that nurse get-up again. Not that
seeing a faux Quinn is much better, but it works for now.”
“If that’s all, I can always arrange for one of your beloved former
teachers to pop in. Would you prefer Barch, Gibson, or DaFoe? DeMartino
is out, because of the eye, but I could pull off O’Neill if ya like,”
Jane winked as Daria blanched.
“Good Lord no! That would be all I needed to dream about! But thanks
for the offer,” she said, as there came a knock on the door.
“Miss Morgendorffer? I’m Doctor Jones, I understand you had a little
setback this morning. Miss?” he looked at Jane. “If I may have little
time alone with the patient?” Jane took the hint and winked at Daria as
she went into her ‘Quinn’ act again.
“Like, I’ll see you later, ‘sis’! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” she
snickered, leaving the room in a convincing bounce. Daria sighed.
That’s all I’d need to have a dream about, isn’t it? she thought, shaking her head.